Hard-Riding Cowboy (Kinky Spurs #3) Read online

  She inhaled sharply, but her tears never fell. There was a lot showing in her expression, leaving Nash spinning. Insecurity, fear, and something gentle that Nash didn’t want anyone getting close to but him.

  He locked his arms around her. “Christ, Megan, tell me. What is it?”

  “Nash. I . . .” She drew in a long, deep breath before she dropped the ground out from under him. “I’m pregnant. You’re the father.”

  Chapter 4

  The next ten minutes became a blur that Nash couldn’t quite piece together afterward. He remembered Megan pushing past him and going back to tend the bar. He recalled leaving through the back door, knowing he needed to get himself together before he faced her and said the wrong fucking thing. Which was entirely possible considering he couldn’t even form a coherent thought. He recalled getting into his truck and driving to Shep and Emma’s white farmhouse, finding Chase’s truck there.

  His mind remained ghostly quiet as he sat on one of the rocking chairs on the porch with the red barn across the driveway. Next to that was a paddock that housed a dozen animals that had come from abusive situations. Nash dropped his head in his hands and breathed once. Twice. Three times. There had only been one time before this that words had knocked him flat on his ass like the words Megan had told him. Those words had been: Your career is over.

  “Do you plan on coming in?”

  Shep. That was Shep’s voice.

  “He looks stunned.”

  Chase.

  Nash vaguely noticed Chase drop into the chair next to him. While Shep leaned against the post. He was sure there was a delicate way to broach the subject, but he couldn’t think of it. “Megan’s pregnant.”

  “Pregnant?” Chase asked, running a hand over his spiky brown hair. He’d been the only one who got their father’s brown eyes; both Nash and Shep were blue-eyed like their mother. “I hadn’t heard she was dating anyone.”

  “Me neither,” said Shep, his sharp eyes studying Nash intently, his hands stuffed into his Levi’s.

  Nash had no doubt Shep would know how to handle this like a pro. He’d fallen easily in as the leader of the family when their father passed. Nash ran his hands through his hair and explained, “The baby is mine.”

  A heavy beat passed.

  If this had happened to one of his brothers, Nash would have laughed. He reveled in being the wild child, not falling in line without a little pushback. He lived to bend the rules or outright break them. Now, he felt as if he were treading water, barely able to breathe. A baby? Sure, he’d thought about having kids at some point in his life. But not now. Not even close to now.

  “Can you repeat that?” Shep finally asked, giving his head a good hard shake. “Megan is pregnant and having your baby? When did you even sleep with her?”

  “At Chase’s wedding,” Nash replied.

  “And neither of you said anything to anyone about it?” Chase asked.

  “I didn’t,” Nash reported. “And it seems neither did Megan.” Their night hadn’t been something he would’ve told his brothers, or anyone for that matter., about Because that had been their moment. A moment he fought like hell to get back.

  Chase scratched the scruff on his face. “Jesus. And she’s pregnant?”

  Nash nodded.

  “You didn’t wear a rubber?”

  Shep’s scathing tone caused Nash to grit his teeth. “Yeah, of course, I did.” He also recalled the condom hadn’t broken. “Clearly, it was a shoddy brand because that shit didn’t work.”

  “Must have had a hole,” Chase muttered.

  Nash assumed that too. Or the condom had expired. What did it matter now?

  Shep drew in a long, deep breath then strode back into the house, the screen door slamming shut behind him. Nash leaned his head back against the rocking chair, staring out at Bentley, whom he’d brought home after his ride today. Bentley lived here at Shep’s farm, and Nash didn’t want to take him away from what he knew, especially considering the horse had been abused before he arrived at Emma’s farm.

  Thoughts raced through his mind, one after another, and he tried desperately to find answers. She had seemed fine for the few weeks after they’d been together but lately, she’d grown distant. He guessed the baby was why. But what bothered him the most was the thought she had been going through all this alone.

  When the front door opened again, Shep exited the house carrying three shot glasses and a bottle of whiskey. He poured the shots then offered full glasses to Nash and Chase. “Here.”

  “Thanks.” Nash tossed back the drink, embracing the fiery liquid burning down his throat.

  A heavy moment passed before Chase said gently, “I hate to be the one to bring this up, but are you certain the baby is yours?”

  Nash poured himself another shot then leveled his brother with a hard look. “It’s Megan.” He tossed the shot back before placing the glass down on the table upside down. “She would never lie about this.”

  Shep turned his focus entirely onto Nash, arching a single eyebrow. “What are you going to do here?”

  “Fuck. Right now, I’m trying to get my feet on solid ground again.” Nash leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees. The conversation with her came back to him. “Today, I thought she was pissed because of what happened with her dad.”

  A dry laugh spilled from Chase’s mouth. “Oh, shit, that hadn’t even crossed my mind. Harrison is going to kill you.”

  “Not if I kill him first,” Nash grumbled, feeling the tension ease through his muscles from the effects of the booze. “The bastard deserves to be clocked, maybe this will give me a good reason to do it.”

  Shep snorted. “Getting put in the slammer will do nothing to help Megan.”

  The prick deserved a thousand punches for all the shit he’d caused over the years. “I’m aware.”

  Shep studied Nash a moment then finally drank his shot. “You’re going to have to make peace with him.”

  Nash scoffed at his older brother. “Never going to happen, brother.” At the thought of the looming headache that was going to bring, Nash poured himself another small shot. Once he polished it off, he said, “I can handle the likes of Clint Harrison.”

  Chase’s eyes shone with amusement. “What of Megan, can you handle her?”

  Nash snorted dryly. “You both know Megan isn’t exactly a woman that you ‘handle.’” Because she could push back as much as Nash could push forward. The game between them had worked for a long time.

  Not anymore. A baby changed everything.

  “Yeah, she’ll keep ya honest,” Chase agreed with a soft nod. He poured another shot then tossed it back.

  The goats began bleating. One jumped on the other’s back, with the horses watching on like they were some crazy creatures that were not meant to be understood.

  “Some brotherly advice,” Shep offered. “A girl like Megan, she’s got it all. Every night she has dozens of men hitting on her, offering her the greatest sex of her life.”

  “Is this supposed to make me feel better?” Nash frowned.

  Shep’s mouth twitched. “All I’m saying is, be the man who doesn’t offer her that but offers her more.” The phone inside began ringing, and he strode off to answer it.

  Nash sat back against the rocking chair again, watching the goats bouncing around in excitement.

  “You’re going to be all right.”

  Nash glanced sideways, finding familiar warmth in Chase’s eyes. “Yeah, I know. I’m blindsided to hell, but it’ll work out.”

  Chase propped an ankle over his knee, staring at the pasture. “Megan’s good for you.”

  “That is without question,” Nash agreed. Everyone knew he and Megan had a thing. His brothers certainly knew that he wanted Megan. Nash had never been shy about that.

  “Are you together now?” Chase gently asked.

  Nash ran his hand across his tired eyes again. “When I woke up today, I was chasing her like I’ve always chased her. Now, I don’t know anyth
ing.”

  Chase rose, maybe sensing that what Nash needed most of all right now was time to think. “The universe seems to throw a lot of wild wrenches into your life. But this is a good one.”

  It was no secret Nash had been struggling since his forced retirement. His rodeo days were behind him. Chase, out of anyone, knew that Nash hadn’t been able to find his footing since the life he’d worked hard to gain was suddenly ripped out from under him. Even Nash knew he’d been breathing but not really living, trying to find the thing that lit him up like bull riding did.

  Right now, he wasn’t sure of anything. The only thing he did know was, everything was changing and there wasn’t a damn thing he could do to stop it.

  * * *

  The end of the night had come far too quickly. Megan exited the bar at three o’clock in the morning to journey up to her apartment, and found Nash sitting on the hatch of his truck in the parking lot.

  Her heart fluttered like it did every time he set those intense eyes on her. The bar had cleared out over an hour ago, and Megan had closed up, sending her staff home for the night. Her cowboy boots clicked against the cement, and she couldn’t hear a single car out on Main Street. This time in the early morning, River Rock slept.

  The air was warm, but a slight breeze cut through the stifling summer air. The simmering way Nash’s gaze lit up when she reached him added to the summer heat. His typical smart-ass smile was nowhere to be found now. “I thought you’d left,” she said, to break the silence.

  “I paid Shep and Chase a visit.” He patted the spot next him. “Let’s talk.”

  She hopped up onto the gate, her legs dangling next to his. She slid her finger along the jagged metal of the keys in her hands, not used to feeling uneasiness in her chest. There had never been a day she didn’t have a plan or know exactly what her next steps would be.

  Until now, of course.

  Maybe sensing that, Nash slid his strong fingers over hers fiddling with the keys. “How long have you known about the baby?” he asked gently.

  “I’m eight weeks pregnant now, and I’ve known for about three of those.” By the working of his jaw muscles, he didn’t seem to particularly like that fact.

  “Are you certain?”

  She nodded softly. “I’ve heard the heartbeat.”

  He cursed and shook his head, his lips set into a firm line. “I should have been there for that.” Anger tinged his voice. “Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

  She drew in a long deep breath, admitting the decision she’d made after the doctor told her the six home pregnancy tests she’d taken weren’t wrong. “For the first couple weeks, I was in shock.” She glanced down to his hand over hers. It suddenly occurred to her how much she liked that. “After reality finally sank in, I didn’t know how to blow our worlds apart.”

  A long moment passed. A heavy minute when he stroked her fingers with his. He finally lifted his unfamiliar gentle—and serious—gaze to hers. “We’ll get through this together.”

  She swallowed back the sudden thick emotion in her throat. She hadn’t known how much she needed to hear those words. “I know this is all shocking and a big mess—”

  He placed a hand on her belly. “Not a mess,” he said softly. “We’re having a baby.”

  The world all but somersaulted around her. She’d seen many sides of Nash over the years of knowing him. The arrogant, cocky side that turned her on. The strong, loyal side he showed to his family. But this soft side was new and wonderful, and had the power of melting her into a pile of goo. “All right then, where do we go from here?” she asked, hoping he knew. She’d been struggling with that question for weeks.

  “We cut the bullshit and give this a go.”

  Shocked by that answer, she slowly looked up at him.

  He pressed his hand tighter against her belly. The single action felt like a promise he was making to her and the baby. “The game between us has been fun,” he explained, voice thick with emotion. “I’ve enjoyed the hell out of every minute of pursuing you. The chase, the hunt, and the win were all equally as fun.” He paused to smile. “Even this second round of chasing you has been enjoyable, to a point.” He leaned in closer and said, with total certainty, “But we both knew this is where we wanted to end up. No more games. You’re with me now.”

  Her mouth parted. Oh, how it easy would be to say yes. To believe that this sweet side of Nash could stay forever. That she mattered above all else. That the baby mattered. But Nash was cocky and reckless, and history told her the reason Nash was so invested now was because she was having his baby. When it came to family, Nash was loyal to the bone. But where did she fit into in all that? “Our situation is not that easy, and you know it,” she reminded him. “There’s a lot standing in our way.”

  “Oh, yeah, like what?”

  “My father.”

  He snorted and slowly removed his hand to cross his arms. “Your father isn’t standing between us. He is an annoyance that I’ll deal with.”

  Nash’s clipped tone only proved her right. The anger her father and Nash shared ran deep, on both sides. “I don’t think dealing with him is that simple.”

  “It is that simple.” In Nash’s typical style, he switched the subject. “What else?”

  All right, if he wanted honesty. “You take nothing seriously,” she said. “You’re the wild child of the family. The guy I’ve never seen in a committed relationship.” She paused, wondering how far she should push. Then she realized she couldn’t hold back now, not with a baby on the way. “You’re the man who’s running from a past he refuses to face.”

  Nash jumped off the cab and stepped in between her legs, sliding his callused hands along the sides of her bare thighs. “I take you seriously. I take the baby seriously. I will take our life together seriously.” He dropped his head into her neck and pressed his lips against her skin there in the way he obviously realized—all too quickly—drove her insane. “Right now, you and the baby are the only two things that matter.”

  Just as he began sweeping her away with his mind-boggling kisses, she pressed her hands against his chest, stopping him.

  “It is not that easy, Nash.”

  His eyes searched hers a moment, then he frowned. “Are there obstacles between us? Yes, there are a few things we’ll need to work through. I see them there too. But you aren’t even letting us try and figure this all out. Will it be a little messy? Maybe, but that also doesn’t mean we should run away. I’ve wanted you for a long time, Megan. I’ve never kept quiet about that.”

  “You wanted to win me,” she pointed out.

  With no hesitation, he inclined his head. “You’re damn right I did, and I have zero qualms about it.” He cupped her face, those gorgeous eyes seeming to look right through her to places no man had looked before him. “I’ve let the game play out because I thought what we had was fun, and I wasn’t looking for anything serious. You needed more time. I gave it to you. But things have changed now. You’re having my baby. The game ends right here, right now.” He stepped closer, bringing her against his strength. “Stop being so damn afraid of me. The last thing I want to do is hurt you.”

  At that, she paused. Something soft and unfamiliar crossed his expression then. For months—hell, years—she’d been putting up a wall between them because Nash made her weak. Hell yes, she was scared. Terrified that he would take and take from her . . . until there was nothing left, and she was merely someone who had once resembled a strong woman. Nash had demons from losing his PBR career. Demons that were clear in his eyes. Demons that had him keeping everyone at a distance. And that could break her heart. Easily.

  Whatever showed in her expression had him cupping her face tight in his hands and murmuring, “One chance. That’s all I’m asking. If I fuck up, fine, I fuck up, and we’ll figure out how to co-parent and make that work. But give me a chance to show you we’re going to be fine.”

  The desperation on his face clenched her heart. This man . . . this man . . . t
he tenderness, the support, the heat of his touch . . . she couldn’t ignore her draw to find out if perhaps she had misjudged Nash, and in this life-changing moment, the rest of the shit between them would fade away to something good and healthy and happy.

  The perfect safe place to raise their baby.

  They both deserved that, didn’t they?

  Instead of finding impossible words to answer him, she stared into his potent blue eyes, wanting to let her guard fall away. They were born to hate each other. But even so, the children of Blackshaw Cattle Company and Irish Creek Ranch had ended up being friends. Great friends. She cared for both Shep and Chase, but Nash . . . he was on an entirely different level.

  In the silence, he dropped his chin and brushed his lips across hers, teasing her with what could be so hot between them. “You need to answer me, Freckles.”

  Heat spiraled through her at the soft rumble of his voice. She ran her fingers over his scruffy face and decided to let her body speak for her. Leaning forward a little, she pressed her mouth against his, owning the kiss for a heartbeat. He drew their bodies closer, leaving no space between them, and he deepened the kiss, filling her with passion so easily.

  After that, there was only her need and his answering lust driving their bodies together. And when his kiss turned urgent, he gathered her in his arms and led them around the other side of his truck. Her back bumped against the passenger side door. It didn’t matter if anyone could see them. She wanted him, needed him. Desperately.

  He nipped her neck. “Can we do this? Is it safe?”

  “I’m already pregnant,” she gasped, and squirmed when he licked his way from the base of her shoulder to her ear.

  His low chuckle spread across her in a wild rush. “I mean for the baby. You already know I can be rough.”

  “Oh.” Her eyes fluttered when he grabbed her breasts and squeezed, never stopping with the nips on her neck. “The doctor told me that as long as sex is comfortable for me, it’s comfortable for the baby.”

  He massaged her breasts again. “You’ll tell me right away if something’s uncomfortable?”