Restrained Under His Duty Read online

  I want her to come. So I take her there, giving her exactly what she needs from me. I break free from her mouth and she leans her head back, eyes shut against the pleasure I’m offering. I grunt at the heady sounds of lust escaping her mouth and drop my head into her neck, swirling my tongue against her pulse point. I gyrate my hips harder now, from side to side, working her sensitive clit until she begins panting. There’s much I expected from Hadley, but I never expected her to surrender so easily, so perfectly. Now that I taste the sweetness of it, I want to demand everything from her.

  I want it all.

  Something carnal rises within me, something I can’t control. It’s her beauty. It’s the perfection of the way she sounds, the scent of her, the feel of her…I growl against her neck, sliding my tongue against the saltiness of her flesh, when I hear the hitch of her breath.

  “I’m going to come,” she rasps. “Oh, God, don’t…stop…”

  Her voice…her unadulterated moan of pleasure…the beginning quiver of her rising orgasm…I don’t recall the moment when I unzipped my pants and took out my bare cock. I remember hearing her soft whimper; the slow ascent of the high I took her on, but I don’t even recall the first touch of her sweet pussy against my dick. All I know is suddenly the lust in her gorgeous eyes and the feel of her tight, wet cunt is around me.

  To feel her…to be as close as possible to her…I need it to survive.

  The perfection of her body takes me to a place that’s not of this world, and I can only nestle my head into her neck and take what I’ve wanted for so long. She wraps her other leg around my waist, her arms around my neck squeezing hard, and I grasp her bottom in my hands, holding her tight to the wall, and I pump into her, hard and unforgiving.

  This…this is all for me.

  Her loud moans are music to my ears as the slapping of skin against skin, the musky scent of sex, and her slick heat are all I know. She wiggles against me to possibly move, to even take pleasure in the way she wants it, but I’ll have none of it. Not when she’s finally mine to take. I press harder with my chest, pinning her just where I want her, and I sink my teeth into the fleshy part of her neck. Her shuddering breath of pleasure and pain brushes against my ear, and I shift my hips harder, smacking my pelvis against her, shoving my cock as deep as I can get.

  Fast and hard, I find the perfect rhythm to build the pleasure, higher and higher, taking us to the very peak of euphoria. Her body is my perfect playground. She’s tight and wet and hugs the thickness of my shaft to perfection. With every shift of my hips and each time my pelvis smacks against her clit, she responds to what I need of her, clamping like a vise around me, pulling at my release.

  But I wait…I keep my teeth tight against the flesh on her neck, flooding her with endorphins because I want her orgasm. It’s mine. Her pleasure belongs only to me. And it’s only when I feel the hard tremble of her limbs and the convulsions on my cock that I release my teeth.

  The hitch of her breath is a wonderful mix of surprise and intensity, tightening my balls. She freezes only for a second before she’s writhing against me, soaking me in her arousal. I hang there, fighting back my climax that’s burning to release, pumping savagely into her, allowing her to ride out her release, getting myself closer…and closer…and closer.

  But then I lift my head and look at her, and it’s game over.

  It’s in that very second her dark, lustful eyes meet mine as her climax releases her that I realize she owns me, too. There’s nothing I wouldn’t give her. Something runs very deep between us, something that even I don’t fully understand, and it steals any remainder of the control I thought I had.

  I yank myself out from her tight heat. “Get down,” I order.

  She all but drops to her knees, and I grasp my cock, and none too gently I stroke hard and fast, staring into her eyes that encapsulate a soul I crave to protect.

  My muscles burn and flex, the overwhelming pleasure clenching my jaw. “Where?”

  Red-cheeked and dozy-eyed from satisfaction, she opens her mouth, and just as I took all of her, she takes all of me, until she drains me dry.

  “Fucking hell,” I grunt, when the last of my seed spills onto her tongue. Breathlessly, I rest a hand on the wall and give myself one final stroke, glancing down at her.

  She leans up and kisses my spent dick, then gives me a sexy grin. “I don’t think I can move.”

  “Then don’t. I like you there on your knees for me.” I lean down, cupping her chin and then do what I seemed so incapable of doing earlier. I seal my mouth across hers and kiss her softly.

  Chapter 8

  Hadley

  Late into the night, I’m not sure what woke me but sleep is not in the plan. My mind is racing and I don’t want to wake up Ryder, who’s sleeping soundly next to me, with all my ridiculous tossing and turning. I leave the bed as quietly as I can and grab the fuzzy blanket off the chair in the corner of my room, as well as my cell off the night table, and wrap the blanket tight around my shoulders. I hear the end of the blanket dragging against the floor behind me as I pad my way to the door leading to my balcony.

  When I reach outside, the warm air hits me and I finally feel like I can breathe again. My head is a confusing mess, which is working its way into my muscles, making them tight and anxious. I move to the outdoor couch underneath the sconce on the wall and curl up in the corner, staring at the sparkling lights on the Bay Bridge.

  With a long sigh, I glance at my phone, seeing a text from my good friend Maddy.

  Dude. Check out this beach in Thailand. Wish you were here.

  God, I can’t say I don’t wish I was there either, especially now that soon my life might become very public. From the rocky cove to the green water to the blue sky, I stare at the picture of paradise and wonder why I stay in the city and don’t live a wild life like Maddy, who works odd jobs so she can travel the world.

  I text back: Gorgeous! Wish I was there, too. Keep sending pictures. San Fran is dreary these days. Miss you!

  Well, stop missing me and come see me!

  Maybe soon. Promise. Because getting out of San Francisco might be necessary if this video gets out and the press stalks me.

  That’s good enough for me. Gotta run. Later, dollface.

  I send a heart emoji as my final message, not really sure what else to say. Things just seem so crazy, so out of control. Ryder and I have lived in this safe space for a year now, never crossing that boundary. And now that we have…I admit to myself, I’m a little scared, right down to my bones.

  “Hadley.”

  I glance up, finding Ryder standing in the doorway, wearing only his black cargo pants. Strong stance, thick thighs, great bulge in his pants, V at the hips, ripped abs, wide chest and shoulders, and eyes…lips…God, no man has ever been so fuckable. “Now there’s a view worthy of gawking.”

  If it wasn’t for the flash of heat that burns across his expression, I might think he didn’t hear me. “Why are you out here?” he asks.

  I shrug.

  He watches me closely then sighs. “Listen, about tonight, I should have worn a condom. That was reckless of me, and I’m sorry—”

  I nearly roll my eyes at him. Men, they won’t ever change. “First of all, I’m not upset that you didn’t wear a condom, and that’s not why I’m out here. If I wanted you to wear one, I would have said something, so stop looking so torn up about it.” He doesn’t look convinced so I gently add, “Besides, I know you wouldn’t be so reckless if you weren’t clean. I also know you wouldn’t have done that if you didn’t think I wasn’t clean, too, or on birth control, which I am. I’ve been on the pill for years. I’m a big girl, Ryder. My body. My rules.” I see his shoulders sag in relief and can only assume I’ve let him off the hook. “Sometimes life happens, and reckless or not, you just gotta roll with it.”

  His expression softens a little as he glances over my bare legs, then he looks out to the bridge. When he turns to me again, his features are hard, as is his voice. “
It’s not wise for you to be out here.”

  I frown. “Do you honestly believe someone is sitting out there photographing me?”

  “Yes.”

  I blink and tighten the blanket around me a little. “Seriously?” It’s not something I had considered.

  He leans against the doorframe, crossing his arms. “Truthfully, I don’t know, but I always err on the side of caution and assume that everyone is being watched all the time.”

  “That’s a terrible way to live.”

  “Possibly, but it’s the way I must live. Now come inside where we know you’re not being photographed.”

  He’s too serious. I don’t want him to return to his old self. I want him to stay focused on the heat between us, so I rise and slowly lower one side of the blanket off my shoulder. “What if they printed this in the tabloids, would that bother you?”

  “Hadley.” He frowns.

  “No?” I ask playfully. “Really, this wouldn’t bother you?” I lower the blanket just a bit more, exposing skin I know he’s way more possessive of than he wants to admit aloud.

  He’s staring at my bare flesh, intensity burning in his eyes. Then he’s there, right in front of me, and he yanks me into his arms and presses a tender kiss on my shoulder. When he lifts his head, he brings the blanket back over my shoulder and gives me a heated smile. “I’ve never been very good at sharing” is the only answer he’s obviously prepared to give me. He places his hand on my back, nudging me into my apartment and shutting the door behind us.

  Inside my living room all the lights are turned off, but as I walk by, I turn one of the lamps on before dropping down onto the couch and curling up into the corner. When Ryder joins me, I can tell by the curiosity in his expression that he’s wondering where my thoughts are at.

  I know him well enough to know he wants to talk about it, so why avoid the inevitable. “There’s a lot against us,” I admit.

  “There is,” he agrees.

  That’s the heaviness on my mind, I decide. We’ve waited for this. But now that it’s happened, it almost feels like it’s happening at the wrong time, with too much chaos around us. “If this video gets out, the trouble it will cause you…”

  “Hadley, we still have time. Don’t think of what-ifs.”

  How could I not? Because the what-ifs are at the center of my life. “I don’t want this to hurt you, Ryder.”

  He slides one arm over the back of the couch as one eyebrow arches. “You’re thinking of me?”

  “It’s my dirty little secret,” I say with a nod. “This video is a character assassination for anyone attached to it. If this video comes out, and then the tabloids continue on with this story that we’re together…your business…?”

  “You don’t need to worry about the tabloids.” I see him fighting against himself. Like he has something he wants to tell me but can’t. Eventually, he continues, “I’m ahead of the situation with the tabloids. They won’t print anything that I don’t already know about. Trust me on that. They won’t know that we are dating.”

  His choice of words freezes me in my seat. “And is that what we are doing? Dating?”

  He watches me closely for a very long moment that seems to go on and on. Until he finally speaks up again. “Is waking up and overthinking a habit for you?”

  “Not normally, but these are not normal times.” I give a weak smile.

  He pauses. “I suppose that’s true.” Another pause. Then, “Let me ask you this: How can two people be dating without ever going on a proper date?”

  I cock my head and give him a look. “Are you suggesting that a guy who owns a sex club is old-fashioned?”

  He doesn’t smile. All too serious. And of course he doesn’t focus on what I’ve said but asks his own question. “Why are you worrying about this?”

  Obvious concern tightens the corners of his eyes, and before he can get deeper into the line of thinking that I’m immature, I add, “I can handle just sex, but I think we need to be clear if that’s what we’re doing.”

  The side of his mouth arches. “You’re worried that I will cross an emotional line?”

  I shrug. “At this point, we’ve already crossed a lot of lines we both know we shouldn’t, don’t you think?”

  He watches me in that intense way he does and then he gives a dry laugh. “Has anyone ever told you that you don’t act like you’re twenty-five?”

  “Has anyone ever told you that it’s rude to discuss a woman’s age?”

  He barks a loud laugh now. “Fair enough. We want complete transparency, then?”

  I nod. “Anything else will get us in trouble.”

  I like how he smiles at me with that dimple and all. It shows me just how much he likes me. “Well, then, I think you and I have the potential to be explosive.”

  “In a good way or bad?”

  “Both.” He inhales deeply, and then runs his finger from my ankle all the way up my thigh, pushing the blanket out of his way. “You’re right, we have a lot stacked against us at the moment. By the time this particular adventure ends, we’ll either come out of this stronger or destroyed, and that’s a truth I don’t think either of us can ignore.”

  He’s right—I couldn’t. But…“Tell me why you think that.”

  “Because that’s what happens when you take a bite out of forbidden fruit.” I can tell he means it. The way he’s looking at me is like he knows he shouldn’t have me, but he just can’t help himself. “It’s either worth it or it burns you in the end.”

  I have to admit that I like that he’s taking risks for me. I want to take them for him, too. “All right,” I drawl. “Where exactly does that leave us, then?”

  “It leaves us taking this minute by minute until our lives have somehow returned to a place where a relationship would be healthy.” He closes the distance between us; his warm breath brushes across my lips. “We needed this tonight. Both of us. But for now, I’m not thinking of the future, I’m thinking of right now. And I know exactly what I want.”

  “What’s that?” I whisper, shivering at the dark lust filling his eyes.

  He doesn’t answer me with words. He leans in and our lips dancing together say it all. Then, with little effort on his part, I’m in his arms and he’s leading us back to the place we both want to go.

  My bed.

  He slides the blanket off my shoulders, leaving me bare, and lays me down against the mattress. Keeping his eyes fixed on me, he drops his pants and climbs onto the mattress, hovering over me. Then he answers me fully and completely. “You’ll never be just sex to me, Hadley.” His eyes are locked onto mine, staring so deeply. “Tonight, I want you until the sun comes up and reality returns to us.” He opens my bedside drawer and takes out a condom, which he clearly remembered from when he was looking for bugs, then he slides oh-so-perfectly between my thighs. “I want you in the way I’ve always wanted you—naked and beneath me.” He opens the condom and sheathes his hard cock. “And for now that’s enough for me.” One brow arches. “Is that enough for you?” He stares at me and waits, making the choice mine.

  Maybe not forever, but he’s right—for now, it is. “Just shut up and kiss me.”

  The smile he gives me is all the foreplay I need. Obviously he knows it, because he does nothing to prepare me. The tip of his cock presses against my slick slit as his tongue slides across mine. He swallows my moan as he enters me, arching my back, pressing me into the strength of his body.

  In and out, his cock fills me, moving in, deeper and deeper. I explore the flexing muscles of his back while he warms me up, pulling on everything inside of me that aches to be claimed by him.

  “Christ, your pussy is perfect,” he murmurs, flipping our positions.

  Straddling him, I shift my hips back and forth and set a slow rhythm, encouraged by the way he’s looking at me. Intense. Playful. Delighted, even. Back and forth, I move against him, as his hands lift to my breasts. He tweaks my nipples, pinching the buds and releasing them, gently and teasi
ngly.

  “You’ve imagined doing this to me, yes?” he asks.

  “Yes,” I moan, pressing my hands against his hard chest. God, he’s perfection. I run my fingers over his ripped abs, feeling each and every one of his muscles flex beneath my fingers.

  His eyebrows draw together, a low moan escaping his mouth, as he releases my nipples. With his big, strong, capable hands, he massages my breasts until I’m shifting faster.

  “Have you touched yourself in this bed thinking of me beneath you?” he asks, dragging his fingers under the curve of my breasts down my stomach, leaving me shivering.

  “Many times,” I rasp, tossing my head back, arching into the pleasure.

  His hands slide back up my torso, over my breasts, and his fingers thrust into my hair. Keeping his back on the mattress, he brings my mouth down to his. His lips press against mine, stirring the intensity inside that only he brings out so naturally.

  It’s the way he kisses that means everything. He’s slow, patiently pulling me into his command. It’s like he tries to be gentle until I make him crazy with need. And then he always deepens the kiss, moving his mouth roughly against mine, breathing deep. He enjoys kissing me, and I like how much he enjoys it.

  But this time he doesn’t deepen the kiss, he backs away.

  I see how he’s fighting for control in the quiver of his muscles and the tightness in his expression when he rests his hands on my thighs and instructs, “Show me what you thought about doing to me.”

  His eyes begin scanning over my breasts, my face, and he doesn’t help me shift my hips. He gives me that control. I realize why—today he lived out the fantasy of having me, indulging himself in the way he’s thought of doing for a year.

  Now it’s my turn.

  I begin rocking my hips, looking down at the muscles on his torso that held my mind for so long. Oh, how I imagined touching them while his rock-hard cock pleasured me. But he was even better than I could have dreamed. I trace every curve of his muscles, memorizing all the lines that make up his spectacular body. Then I look into his eyes and feel the spike in my heart rate. He is sexy. He is what men strive to be, and he is that naturally. The power he commands with a single look is staggering.